"The sea, once it casts its spell,
holds one in its net of wonder
forever."
Jacques Yves Cousteau
The beauty of living on an island is that there is no shortage of beaches, inlets, coves and estuaries to explore. We visit the sea year round. This particular beach is one of the few with sand so it's a favourite regardless of the season. We ran into some friends and found some treasures. I feel like we breathe a little easier and walk a little lighter after an afternoon by the sea.
When we first started talking about selling our little house I felt a lot of resistance. I couldn't imagine finding anything that felt as "home" as that house. In birthed my babies there, we raised chicks, kept bees, cultivated that garden. It was home. Even though we were feeling very cramped in there the outdoor spaces kept us anchored there.
Now we are trying to find our anchor here. We are putting personal touches all over the house. We painted, put up wallpaper, hung photos, refinished the floors but the work isn't done. I'm finding comfort in these corners of our new home that make me feel comfort and contentment. I'm hoping as we settle in more and finish more of the ongoing projects I can share more of our new home.
Art print from Little Truths Studio
Wallpaper from Wayfair
For the past year or so, A has been exploring a new way of expressing her deep love and connection with nature. She gathers materials that resonate with her and with mindful focus she creates these beautiful mandalas. I've never asked her what sparked this kind of expression; I merely admire her creativity and the unique beauty of each one. I've been taking pictures of her creations in the hopes of compiling enough pictures to create a calendar of them all for 2022. How do you express your love of nature?
"It is okay if it takes time
for this mountain to be climbed"
-Morgan Harper Nichols
It's human nature to seek out connection. We are social creatures with brains wired to receive pleasure from a hug or laughter. Maintaining distance from family and community is effective in disease control but damaging to our mental well-being. Prolonged isolation has been shown to be damaging to our brains. So how are we to find connection in the midst of a global pandemic?
"This too shall pass" I've repeated to myself over and over for the past year. I know that impermanence is a law of nature; nothing lasts forever be it good or bad. I've tried to find connection online with groups of like minded people. I've tried to do video chats with loved ones. I've tried learning something new in online classes. It's like a bandaid on a bullet wound. For a moment it seems like a good idea. But it's no substitute, it won't address the root problem. We need human connection. We need touch; whether it's a handshake, a hug, a supportive hand on the shoulder. We need to look into each other's eyes and listen to to complex nature of verbal communication.
I'm longing for those things. I know we all are. Our brains are trying to figure out who we are with that human connection. But time will march on and we will once again be able to embrace. You are not along in your longing and your sorrow. We miss each other. Just remember "this too shall pass".
For the past few years we've been exploring the world of geocaching. It was really fun for a while. It was a great family activity. However, relying on the GPS app was a big challenge and sometimes I just wanted to put the screen away and be in nature. So we stumbled upon this movement called Sooke to Sidney Rock Hunt. The community would paint rocks and hide them around their communities for others to find. You could keep the rock or re-hide it somewhere for another to find. It was wonderful fun!
We've found rocks in the most unexpected places (in a parking lot, on a ledge by the liquor store) and it's been a motivation to get outside and visit places we haven't been before. The kids and I both painted rocks with enthusiasm. We wrote the year on the back in the hopes that at sometime in the future we will find the rocks again and be surprised by how long it's been since we painted it.
It's very tempting for my children to keep each rock they find. It's like treasure for them and the would love to have a box of their collected rocks. However, the spirit of the movement is to spread joy with the rocks and share art and nature with the community. It doesn't seem right or fair to keep every rock we've found. So they each have one or two rocks that mean something special to them and the others have been re-hidden for others to delight in.
If you'd like to take part in the fun search Sooke to Sidney Rock Hunt on Facebook to find the group (I'm no longer on Facebook so I don't have the link). If you find a rock on the island labelled SSRH or SS Rock Hunt those are part of the hunt as well. Enjoy, be safe and have fun.
About a year after I stopped writing here some concerns popped up with F. At his two year well visit our doctor expressed concern that he wasn’t developing speech as expected. By age 2 the guidelines are for children to have about 20 words, even if they are only understood by their parents. F had 3 and I was one of the few who could determine whether he was saying “da” for Dad or “duh” for dog. And we also noticed he could not purse his lips to blow out a candle or blow bubbles. It was time to seek early intervention.
I must say that the speech language pathologists we met were all wonderful. They were very patient with a frustrated little boy and worried mama. Regardless of diagnosis, early and intensive speech therapy has been shown to have excellent outcomes for most children with a speech language disorder.
This is when I discovered the incredible misunderstanding of politicians and health officials when it came to early intervention. We live in Canada where we pay into a universal healthcare plan. At the time we paid $150 per month to be covered. This is supposed to include services like early intervention and speech therapy. However, Island Health only receives a fraction of the funds required to provide this service. Not enough SLPs are employed to meet the needs of the community and as a result the clients in the programs are not receiving critical care. Children with speech language disorders are generally recommended to attend speech therapy at least twice a week. We received one appointment every few months. It was unbelievable. The delay in receiving treatment could mean the difference between communicating at the same level as their peers or requiring assistance for the rest of their lives.
At age 3, we were given a diagnosis of Childhood Apraxia of Speech for F. CAS is a motor planning disorder. It means his brain knows what it wants and needs to do to produce speech but somewhere along the line the message gets confused and the muscles don’t work as planned. Children with CAS have no problem with intelligence. They simply cannot get the messages to the muscles they need to communicate.
Treatment for Childhood Apraxia of Speech is intense speech therapy so F saw a SLP three to two times a week. As government supplied therapy could not meet his needs we sought out private therapy. We experienced a lot of tears and a lot of triumphs. After many years and lots of hard work by F he was able to build the neural pathways required to speak at the same level as his peers.
He is not cured by any means, it is a life long condition. As he grows and his vocabulary expands, learning to pronounce new words will be a continued challenge. But I know he has the will rise to every challenge.
Below are some pictures of F in his therapy sessions. Look at the pride on his face. Being understood meant so much for him. I know he had so much to share and as he gained the skills to share his thoughts he (and I as well) was filled with joy.
It's undeniable that even in a small way the Covid-19 pandemic was a breath of fresh air for the climate crisis. Less air travel, less cruise ships, less commuters driving to work, less recreational vehicles in lakes and oceans. However, that little bit feels insignificant when you realize that we are fighting a runaway train.
We had a day of brief snowfall before Christmas, then it quickly warmed up. It's felt more like April than January. F asks me often "Is it spring now?" because we see flowers popping up and it's warm enough to leave your jacket at home. It's sad to see how out of sync nature is becoming. It seems that the plants and animals are just as confused about the season as my son is.
Lulu and I have been venturing further from home on our adventures so we can get a good dose of nature. While I love seeing the lush green moss and new ferns, I shouldn't been seeing this rebirth for another two months. As a gardener, I'm lost as to when to prune or plant. It's hard to push the message that it should not be this warm and sunny in the first month of winter here in the PNW. Everyone loves the sunshine and with Covid restrictions getting outdoors is essential. But just because it's enjoyable doesn't mean it's right. It's time for drastic action.
Today was a chance for us girls to spend a little time together in nature. We took Lulu for a little hike while we watched for mushrooms, fat robins and hidden rocks (more on that later). It's not often that A and I get to do things just on our own. She's become so clever and she's so talkative. If you ever wonder what's on her mind she will gladly tell you. She wears her heart on her sleeve just like her mother. As she's getting into the double digits I need to remind myself that no matter how mature she may seem she is still a child and needs nurturing. I must make time for things like this more often.
Just over one year ago this brown eyed gal joined our family. I feel like I had been waiting for her my whole life. I've wanted a dog for as long as I can remember. I'm an animal person it's true but I wanted the companionship of a dog. And after searching and searching we found this lady listed with a Korean rescue. Many of the local rescues would not adopt to our family because our children were under the age of 12. It was very disheartening but Lulu here was ok'd to live with young children so they chose our application.
Lulu didn't have a kind start to her life. For her first year she lived in a cage on a dog meat farm in Korea. She was liberated by a rescue in Korea and lived with them for another 6 months while they got her health and vaccinated before her trip to Canada. I must admit, after reading her story I expected her to be distrusting of people but she's the complete opposite. She's incredibly loving and trusting.
I was under no illusions that it would be easy owning a dog. Lulu was not leash trained so she would pull so much that I ended up with a wrist injury. She had no recall so I was constantly afraid she would get loose and never come back. She did escape our yard a few times but was luckily found and easily approached as she's so friendly.
We did several training classes and she's come so far. She is leash reactive with other animals and that's been a huge challenge. We often walk places we are unlikely to see other dogs. In spite of that she's been the best companion I could have ever dreamed of. She sleeps next to me, loves to cuddle, she doesn't bark or chew, she's very tolerant of the kids (they like to dress her up), she's fun to hike with, she comes running whenever I call. She's so loved.
Like the rest of the world, 2020 for us was dominated by the Covid-19 virus. The lockdown began in March during spring break. It lasted about a month before our province moved forward with safety protocols that allowed people to return to work and centres to reopen.
It was a time of resourcefulness and creativity. Our little house felt very tiny as the pandemic wore on. Schools remained closed and as we were doing our home learning at the dining room table I realized the children needed a space to focus on class work. So I made a “crisis school” room in our garage. It had a space heater, carpet, lights, books, everything they could need. It worked for a while but we quickly learned that Zoom classes were not compatible with the either of my children. Learning became much more hands on and creative. We abandoned the workbooks and made it up as we went along.
Thank goodness we still had our garden and yard. My time in my garden saved my sanity. I would retreat to the greenhouse if it became too cold for the main garden. We delighted in finding a small birds nest built in our greenhouse. And around that same time we found a hummingbird nest just a 3 minute walk from our house. It was a welcome distraction.
When summer finally came we were so relieved to be able to go camping. We needed a change of scenery but we needed our space. However it seems everyone was camping that summer. It was practically impossible to find a site. We lucked out a couple times but were disappointingly sent home just as often.
At the end of the summer we bought our new home and sold our beloved little house. It was a good change but bittersweet. My babies were born there, learned to walk in those halls, we planted gardens there and buried pets there. It was hard to say goodbye. Our new house is calling out for good memories and we shall oblige. Change is welcome.
I can’t believe it’s been almost five years since I’ve written in this space. How much has changed. I took a night to read through my past posts and it was lovely. I had forgotten some of these little moments. We no longer live in our little farm house. And my children are not so little anymore.
It is time to resurrect the blog. We’ve made so many memories and taken big steps forward in the past few years. This blog is like my journal of life as a mother. I don’t want to abandon it.
I hope to come here and share some memories and photographs a few times a month so I can look back several years from now and treasure all these moments. I’m going to play catch up for the next few days. Happy 2021 to all!
